Dangers of the Canadian Mounted (1948)

DANGERS OF THE CANADIAN MOUNTED (1948)
Serial
Article 2411 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 11-2-2007
Posting Date: 3-19-2008
Directed by Fred C. Brannon and Yakima Canutt
Featuring Jim Bannon, Virginia Belmont, Anthony Warde

Sergeant Royal of the Mounties patrols the town of Alcana, on the border between Alaska and Canada. He is hunting criminals who are after the lost treasure of Genghis Khan.

I’ll have to brush up on my history; I don’t recall Genghis Khan having spent a great deal of time in either Alaska or Canada, but then, I don’t have any record of him encountering Maciste, either. At any rate, he appears to have left a treasure in the area, and our dull hero spends most of his time trying to track down a henchman who is working for an unnamed boss (if you sit back and spend about ten seconds thinking about it, you should figure out who that is without having to sit through all twelve episodes) to locate the treasure, which of course, requires that he terrorize highway builders and try to procure books for their kidnapped expert on translating old languages. As a result, we get a lot of fairly ordinary fistfights (this was after the warehouse-wrecking battle royales of Republic’s better days) and lots of tepid cliffhangers; if scenes of people baling out of vehicles is your idea of fun, you’ll be in heaven with this one. There isn’t much fantastic content; mostly, it’s some slight horror/fantasy content having to do with some spooky caves. The most striking fantastic element occurs in the final episode, and has to do with the nature of the treasure that is found, but I won’t give that away, because it’s one of the few satisfying surprises in this one.

Gee, it’s been a long time since I’ve done a serial. I hope some of the remaining ones I have yet to see are better than this one.

 

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)

THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW (1975)
Article 2410 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 11-1-2007
Posting Date: 3-18-2008
Directed by Jim Sharman
Featuring Tim Curry, Susan Sarandon, Barry Bostwick

Two young people engaged to be married find themselves stranded at the castle of Fr. Frank-N-Furter, who has created a creature named Rocky Horror.

I’ve heard tell that the best way to see this movie is at one of the repertory theaters where it plays weekly to an audience of dedicated fans who turn the movie into an interactive audience experience unlike anything else. I’m willing to believe that; the movie certainly lends itself to that sort of treatment; in fact, if I remember my reading correctly, the movie was intended to be watched in this fashion, as the same sort of thing happened during the stage presentations of the show. However, I watched it at home without the benefit of any of those dedicated fans, and have never seen it any other way, so I can only judge it on that level. And, watched in this environment, I’m afraid I found this compendium of horror, science fiction, rock music, sex, campy costumes and campy makeup less than fascinating; it starts out mildly interesting, but gets progressively more tedious as the movie progresses, no matter how many classic horror and science fiction movies it references along the way. Maybe it’s because I was left the impression that it really doesn’t add up to much of anything; if the movie really seems to be about anything, it’s about being campy, and I don’t find that a great attention holder. Still, a movie in which Meatloaf’s character dies a horrible death can’t be all bad. And I’m willing to bet that the presence of the aforementioned audience is what it really needs.

 

Death Cruise (1974)

DEATH CRUISE (1974)
TV-Movie
Article 2409 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-31-2007
Posting Date: 3-17-2008
Directed by Ralph Senensky
Featuring Richard Long, Polly Bergen, Edward Albert

Three couples win an ocean cruise in a contest, but they discover that the contest was a trick; actually, they have all been targeted by an unknown person who wants to kill them all.

What you have here is something of a cross between TEN LITTLE INDIANS and an inverse episode of “The Love Boat” (all of the couples have troubled and unhappy marriages). The notion of characters being picked off one by one like this is a concept that pops up in horror quite a bit, so that appears to be the fantastic content here. As for the movie itself – well, I really don’t know what I think of this one. It’s fairly clever at points, but at others, it’s obvious, annoying, dull, and banal. There is little joy to be had in watching the endless scenes of the various married couples being unpleasant to each other, none of which add to the plot or the suspense. The movie does manage to generate a bit of suspense at times, and the central mystery (what do all of these people have in common that made them targets for the murderer) is fairly intriguing. Yet, in the final analysis, I’m not sure whether I like the explanations at the end of the movie, though I can see the cleverness; there’s something plain unsatisfying about it all. The cast also features Kate Jackson, Celeste Holm and Tom Bosley.

 

The Lost Moment (1947)

THE LOST MOMENT (1947)
Article 2408 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-30-2007
Posting Date: 3-16-2008
Directed by Martin Gabel
Featuring Robert Cummings, Susan Hayward, Agnes Moorehead

A publisher discovers that a certain house in Venice contains several love letters by a famous poet, and, in hopes of getting his hands on them, he disguises himself as a writer so he can move into the house. He discovers some haunting and bizarre secrets about the ancient matriarch that owns the house, and her niece.

This movie is based on a novel by Henry James, who also wrote “The Turn of the Screw”, the famous horror story that served as the basis for THE INNOCENTS . This one is not a horror story, but there are some surprising horror elements to it; the daughter has a truly strange split personality, in that she ends up believing that she is her aunt at a much younger age when she was romancing the poet in question. Combine that with a spooky old house, and you actually have enough eeriness here to make the movie less marginal than it might seem. In fact, I found it reminiscent of HOUSE OF USHER , with the ancient Matriarch of this movie (Agnes Moorehead) somewhat similar to the Roderick Usher character in that movie. The movie’s biggest problem is that it is rather talky, and it requires a certain amount of patience to sit through. Those who do manage, though, may find themselves engrossed by the very interesting story, and it does bear some resemblance to “The Turn of the Screw”, in that madness and obsession with the past both play major roles in the story. The movie also features Eduardo Ciannelli in one of the more sympathetic roles I’ve seen him in.

 

Revenge of the Stepford Wives (1980)

REVENGE OF THE STEPFORD WIVES (1980)
TV-Movie
Article 2407 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-29-2007
Posting Date: 3-15-2008
Directed by Robert Fuest
Featuring Sharon Gless, Julie Kavner, Audra Lindley

A female reporter comes to the town of Stepford to find out why the crime and divorce rate is so low there. She finds that most of the women in the town act like vapid housewives. She begins to discover the town’s dreadful secret…

I never warmed up to the original movie , and one of the major reasons why is that I could never believe that the vapid housework-obsessed frilly-clothes-dressed women of the town actually passed for the ideal woman; I’d be crawling the walls after ten minutes dealing with one of them. This sequel, which spends half of its time recycling the original and the other half of its time undermining the original (by dint of coming up with a different explanation of how the wives are created), does nothing to make it more convincing. It’s hard to believe this dull, lifeless movie was directed by Robert Fuest, whose movies usually have at least some stylistic pizazz to them. The reason they change the Stepford mythology around is simple; it’s to set up the final scenes of the movie, which you can anticipate if you take the time to read the title of the movie. Still, there are at least a couple things I found of interest here; one is the Mason Adams character, who demonstrates that having a Stepford Wife is not all it’s cracked up to be. The other is that the villain of the piece does get a fitting comeuppance, especially if you consider that he is the one who probably decided that all the Stepford women needed to wear those uncomfortable-looking high heels all the time. The cast also features a pre-“Miami Vice” Don Johnson.

 

Charlie Chan in Reno (1939)

CHARLIE CHAN IN RENO (1939)
Article 2406 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-28-2007
Posting Date: 3-14-2008
Directed by Norman Foster
Featuring Sidney Toler, Ricardo Cortez, Phyllis Brooks

When a woman is killed in a hotel in Reno, the suspect is a friend of Charlie Chan’s. Chan comes to Reno to investigate for himself and find the real killer.

This is another very enjoyable entry in the Charlie Chan series at Fox, and Sidney Toler is great in the part, as he was in all of the Fox entries in the series. The mystery itself is quite fun, with a number of interesting suspects, and a fun role for Slim Summerville as a sheriff named Tombstone who doubts Chan’s ability to solve the case. As in most of the Chan movies, the fantastic content is light, but it is there; in this case, the plot takes us to a spooky ghost town at one point, and though no ghosts appear, it does have a decent amount of horror ambiance. The cast also features Victor Sen Yung as Jimmy Chan, Eddie Collins as a talkative cabbie, and Dick-Tracy-to-be Morgan Conway.

 

The Steel Key (1953)

THE STEEL KEY (1953)
Article 2405 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-27-2007
Posting Date: 3-13-2008
Directed by Robert S. Baker
Featuring Terence Morgan, Joan Rice, Raymond Lovell

A con man poses as a scientist in order to get hold of a secret formula for hardened steel. He has to contend with the police and other criminals who also want the formula.

It’s Gizmo Maguffin time. In this case, the Maguffin is as listed above; the formula for hardened steel (personally, I never thought of steel as particularly soft in the first place, but what do I know). It’s never actually used in the film, but everybody’s after it and it leads to murder. The movie is a little confusing at first because it doesn’t leave you much time to sort out the characters and their motivations, but I found the con man charming and clever enough that I got caught up in it anyways, and the plot does sort itself out after a bit. It’s a British B-movie thriller with slight touches of noir to it, and it’s moderately entertaining. It’s worth a look for the curious, if you can find it.

 

Monster Zero (1965)

MONSTER ZERO (1965)
aka Invasion of the Astro-Monsters, Kaiju daisenso
Article 2404 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-26-2007
Posting Date: 3-12-2008
Directed by Ishiro Honda
Featuring Nick Adams, Akira Takarada, Jun Tazaki

Two astronauts explore the newly-discovered Planet X to find a civilization plagued by attacks from a creature known to them as Monster Zero, but to the Earth as King Ghidorah. Earth agrees to let them have Godzilla and Rodan to battle King Ghidorah, but the men from Planet X have an ulterior motive…

Having just encountered the English Language Dubbers Association in yesterday’s movie, I thought I’d give them a rest by watching the subtitled version of this movie, thereby giving the English Language Subtitlers Association a chance to flex their muscles. Well, if I had any hopes of the ELSA of helping me find the spelling of the hero of yesterday’s movie, they were smashed by the realization that the ELSA badly needs some quality control in the spelling department; for the record, it’s “lightning”, not “lightening” and “smoother”, not “smother”. Of course, I’d also forgotten that this movie also features English-speaking Nick Adams in the cast, and, since this is the Japanese version, the Japanese Language Dubbing Association (JLDA) had to be called in to dub him; for the record, I think they do a better job than the ELDA. (I wish to point out here that, with the exception of the ELDA, I’m not sure any of these associations ever really existed).

So enough about dubbing and subtitling; let’s get to the movie. It’s a direct sequel to GHIDRAH, THE THREE HEADED MONSTER ; in fact, it has one less monster than that one, as Mothra does not appear here. It also sets the template for the formula that would become far too common in the original Godzilla series of movies, that of aliens controlling the monsters and using them to attack the Earth. The movie is very slow in getting to the monster action; the only early battle is extremely short, and is more memorable for Godzilla’s hilarious post-victory dance than for anything else. As far as having watched the subtitled version against having watched the dubbed version (which I’d seen several times before), the main advantage I found was that I finally figured out what the practical purpose of that teeth-gnashing sound gizmo was, something I don’t recall as having been explained adequately in the dubbed version; other than that, I might just as well have seen the dubbed one. Nick Adams also appeared in FRANKENSTEIN CONQUERS THE WORLD .

 

Mole Men Against the Son of Hercules (1961)

MOLE MEN AGAINST THE SON OF HERCULES (1961)
aka Maciste, l’uomo piu forte del mondo
Article 2403 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-25-2007
Posting Date: 3-11-2008
Directed by Antonio Leonviola
Featuring Mark Forest, Moira Orfei, Paul Wynter

One of the sons of Hercules (Maciste, or, as they call him in this one, Majestis) does battle with a tribe of mole men, who must live underground for fear of being destroyed by the sun and who have vowed to kill all people who live above ground.

Majestis? I don’t know how they spell it, but instead of the usual pronunciation for Maciste (My Cheese Steak), we get the pronunciation “My Chest Is”. I’m thinking they already used Maciste in one of these “Sons of Hercules” films, and wanted to pretend that this was a different guy with a name that sounded so close to Maciste’s that it would be a breeze for the English Language Dubbers Association (who gets a credit here) to handle. Now, if only the English Language Subtitlers Association was on the ball, I’d know the correct spelling. At any rate, it makes sense that these sword-and-sandal heroes would like names that emphasized their chests, given that both Mark Forest and Paul Wynter have prominent ones (as well as Moira Orfei, but that’s another story). Yes, the mole men have an evil queen who falls in love with Majestis, as well as an evil courtier with plans of his own. It also has the world’s largest manually-operated merry-go-round, an ugly ape creature, bizarre torture devices, a primitive conveyor belt, death by sunlight, and a really big chain. It’s all in a day’s work for a son of Hercules.

 

The Fabulous World of Jules Verne (1958)

THE FABULOUS WORLD OF JULES VERNE (1958)
aka Vynalez zkazy
Article 2402 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-24-2007
Posting Date: 3-10-2008
Directed by Karel Zeman
Featuring Lubor Tokos, Jana Zatloukalova, Miroslav Holub

A scientist is kidnapped by pirates who pretend to be protecting him from those who would prevent him from working on his new invention, a super-powerful bomb. His assistant is also kidnapped, but is kept away from the scientist because he knows the truth of the situation. The assistant vows to escape, contact the scientist, and save the world from the pirates.

Here’s another movie by Karel Zeman, and it’s a sumptuous visual feast. Zeman combines special effects, animation, live action and set design to create a movie and a world totally unlike any other; much of it is intended to emulate the woodcut illustrations of the original Jules Verne novels, and shot after shot in this movie is stunning. The story is based (rather freely) from a Jules Verne novel called “Face au Drapeau”, and this version seems to combine several elements from other Verne stories, most notably the ones about Captain Nemo. The story gets a little dull on occasion, but there’s always something fascinating to look at, and it has fun touches of humor on occasion, and sometimes I sense a Chaplinesque air to the proceedings. It even has a scene involving an early movie projector that plays some rather strange movies, including one with roller-skating camels. Like all of the Karel Zeman movies I’ve seen, highly recommended.