Cult of the Damned (1969)
aka Angel, Angel, Down We Go
Article 5782 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-30-2020
Directed by Robert Thom
Featuring Jennifer Jones, Jordan Christopher, Holly Near
Country: USA
What it is: During this era, who can tell?

The overweight daughter of a rich but sleazy couple runs off with a rock star at her coming-out party. Eventually the rock star decides to meet the rest of the girl’s family. Things happen and words are said.

This is one of those late sixties/early seventies drug-addled counterculture art films; its original title was ANGEL, ANGEL, DOWN WE GO; it was renamed CULT OF THE DAMNED when it was released as a second feature to THE VAMPIRE LOVERS; no doubt the new title was to make it seem more like a horror movie. I suppose it’s some sort of commentary on the American Dream (it drops a few hints in that direction), but I’ll be honest; neither the world of the rich parents nor the one of the rock star and his cohorts look very attractive to me, which is my way of saying that I started the movie not much caring what was going to happen to anybody in the movie, and as it went one, I found myself caring even less. At any rate, I’m not sure it fully qualifies for this series; there are hints of horror around the edges, but it certainly doesn’t play like one and it’s not trying to be one. Frankly, this one isn’t my cup of tea.

The Crystal Brawl (1957)
Article 5781 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-29-2020
Directed by Seymour Kneitel and Izzy Sparber
Featuring the voices of Jackson Beck, Jack Mercer, and Mae Questal
Country: USA
What it is: Popeye in recycle mode

When his date with Olive Oyl is shanghaied by a trick from Bluto, Popeye gets revenge by disguising himself as a fortune teller and showing Olive Oyl the indignities she will suffer at Bluto’s hands.

As the fortune teller, Popeye claims his crystal ball will show Olive Oyl the future, but he’s not entirely accurate; the savvy viewer will know that he’s showing her the past, i.e. archive footage from three earlier Popeye cartoons, ABUSEMENT PARK, QUICK ON THE VIGOR and ALPINE FOR YOU. (Note: there’s a chance that only two of these are used, but that’s still a lot of recycling). At any rate, this is one of those cartoons that owes it existence more to budgetary constraints than to imagination. The fantastic content is the whole “crystal ball predicting the future” angle, but there’s always the “spinach superpower” angle here as well. At any rate, you’d probably be better off finding the original three cartoons and watching those. Consider this one a throwaway.

Crying Wolf (1947)
Article 5780 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-29-2020
Directed by Connie Rasinski
Featuring the voices of Dayton Allen, Roy Halee, Tom Morrison
Country: USA
What it is: Mighty Mouse cartoon

The black sheep of a flock keeps scaring the others with his cry of “Wolf!”. But what will happen when a real wolf shows up? And who will save the sheep then?

Instead of defending a bunch of mice against a cat, Mighty Mouse defends a bunch of sheep against a wolf. Though I’m tempted to give the cartoon a bit of credit for varying the formula that little bit, it’s not the first time this substitution was made; try WOLF! WOLF! from 1944. Borrowing part of the premise from the story of the boy who cried wolf isn’t really a plus, either; it only tells you the plot line that the rest of the cartoon will follow. Nevertheless, this is one of the better of the series, largely because the wolves prove a slightly more formidable opponent than the usual cat, and also because it does yield at least one rather amusing gag (that’s one more than many of the Mighty Mouse cartoons pull off). Still, I’m not sure that’s enough to recommend this one; it’s just a marginally more interesting entry in a tired series.

CreepTales (2004)
Article 5779 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-28-2020
Directed by several people
Featuring Jess Sherman, Michael Minton, Tim Choate
Country: USA
What it is: Horror anthology

Two hunchbacks try to find a video tape for their party. When they find the video store closed, they dig up the grave of Uncle Munger and take the video he was buried with, CREEPTALES. Will they enjoy it? Will Uncle Munger want it back?

Apparently, the various individual stories in this anthology were purchased from others rather than having been made exclusively for this movie. This is probably why any one of the individual stories is superior to the wraparound, which is a loud, incoherent mess. There’s a story about a mad aunt (this story also appears in another anthology, TALES FROM THE UNKNOWN), a purse-snatcher, a kid frightened by what’s in his closet, a group of men hunting a werewolf, visitors to a creepy town, and a woman who cleans up her life with a strange vacuum cleaner. The stories about the purse-snatcher and the vacuum cleaner were my favorites; the rest I found rather tiresome. I found this one on one of a set of DVD anthologies put out by Brentwood a couple of decades ago; each one had ten movies on five double-sided discs, and featured really ugly artwork on the front cover. Overall, this one is pretty forgettable, but it might be better if you fast-forward through the wraparound.

Creepers (1985)
aka Phenomena
Article 5778 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-27-2020
Directed by Dario Argento
Featuring Jennifer Connelly, Donald Pleasence, Daria Nicolodi
Country: Italy, Switzerland
What it is: Argento, of course

The daughter of an American actor is sent to a boarding school in Switzerland. She sleepwalks, has telepathic communication with insects, and helps an entomologist track down a serial killer.

I take my hat off to Argento; I find it fascinating the way he can jumble together a bewildering array of plot elements (enough for three movies) all in one movie and not have it collapse into incoherence. Which is my way of saying that this movie more or less works, especially during a climax which has a few surprises up its sleeve. The version I saw was only 88 minutes, though there is an hour and 56 minute version of it out there. If IMDB is correct, it’s Argento’s favorite of those he directed, though I still prefer SUSPIRIA (which shares a few plot elements with this one). All in all, I found this one pretty good, though it is occasionally bewildering.

Crazy Town (1954)
Article 5776 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-25-2020
Directed by Izzy Sparber
Featuring the voice of Jack Mercer
Country: USA
What it is: Crazy

Welcome to Crazy Town, where things happen in ways we’re not used to in the normal world.

There’s no real story here; it’s just a bunch of gags, mostly of the “exactly opposite of what we’d expect” variety; for example, people walk in the streets and cars use the sidewalks, and storks deliver parents to babies. Some of the gags are hackneyed and obvious, but there are some genuinely surreal and original moments here. Oddly enough, the running gag involving a man (or anthropomorphic animal, as the case may be) trying to build a house feels out of place here; it doesn’t quite fit in with the theme. Since this place can be seen as existing in an alternate universe, it classifies as fantastic content. I wished it worked a little better rather than being so scattershot, but most “random gag” cartoons like this have the same problem.

Crawlspace (1986)
Article 5775 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-25-2020
Directed by David Schmoeller
Featuring Klaus Kinski, Talia Balsam, Barbara Whinnery
Country: USA / Italy
What it is: That’s what we’re trying to figure out.

A young woman becomes a tenant in an apartment building, unaware that the landlord is the homicidal son of a Nazi surgeon.

Is it a slasher, or is it a psycho killer movie? In this one, it’s a little hard to tell. If it’s the former, then getting Klaus Kinski to play your slasher villain is overkill. Still, on the plus side, he’s probably going to make the villain a lot more interesting than it might otherwise be. On the down side, you cast Kinski at your own peril; director David Schmoeller would reflect on the unpleasantness of the experience in a short called PLEASE KILL MR. KINSKI, a plea that was made to the director by the other cast and crew members. On the other hand, if it is a psycho killer movie, we need a somewhat more complex character for our killer than we find here; for example, having our killer be the son of a Nazi surgeon should feel like an organic choice rather than a gimmick. And, once we reach the climax of the movie, it seems to follow the slasher playbook closely. The odd little touches here and there keep the movie from being entirely routine, but overall, it’s a bit on the disappointing side.

Corruption (1933)
Article 5774 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-22-2020
Directed by Charles E. Roberts
Featuring Evalyn Knapp, Preston Foster, Charles Delaney
Country: USA
What it is: Political crime drama

When a newly-elected crusading anti-corruption mayor turns out to mean what he says, his party tries to frame him and get him out of the way.

I was about two-thirds through with watching this movie when it occurred to me that it might qualify for my review criteria. I finally found it listed in the “Forgotten Horrors” book, where it makes it on the grounds of the existence of a mad scientist in the story. This didn’t occur to me at first. What did catch my attention was a murder method that may fall within the bounds of science fiction; as explaining it might involve giving away spoilers, I will say no more. I will say, however, that those elements are the most interesting thing about the movie, which is otherwise your typical B movie material; it’s passable but uninspired, though it does have a couple of interesting characters. Mischa Auer was the only really familiar name I saw in the cast, and he plays the most memorable character.

Confidence (1933)
Article 5773 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-20-2020
Directed by William Nolan and Walter Lantz
Voice cast unknown
Country: USA
What it is: Animated allegory

Oswald the Lucky Rabbit wakes up one morning to discover that his chickens have all become too dispirited to lay eggs. He runs to visit the doctor, who points him the way of the one who can really help him.

If “Confidence” seems like an odd title to an animated cartoon, that’s because it is, but you’ll figure out soon enough that this cartoon is an allegory for the then-current situation rather than just entertainment. The fantastic content of this cartoon is the first hint; we see a spectral figure named “Depression” rising out of the swamps and flying throughout the world, with a noted stop at Oswald’s chicken coop. By the time it started to occur to me that the depression in question was economic rather than emotional, the cartoon was making other statements to clarify it; Oswald’s race to the doctor coincides with anthropomorphic animals demanding their money from the banks, and of course the doctor’s advice is to go to Washington and visit FDR, who appears as an animated figure, sings the title song, and allows Oswald to draw from a barrel of Confidence he keeps in the oval office. No, it’s not a great cartoon, but it’s more about hope in a bad time rather than laughter, and so many cartoons from this era feel unfocused that it’s a genuine novelty to find one with a clear purpose and message. Put this one in the category of “Of Historical Interest”.

The Cobweb Hotel (1936)
Article 5771 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 5-16-2020
Directed by Dave Fleischer and Dave Tendlar
Featuring the voice of Jack Mercer
Country: USA
What it is: Fleischer cartoon

A newlywed fly couple decide to spend the night at the Cobweb hotel, only to discover that the place is a trap run by a hungry spider.

it doesn’t speak well for the mental acuity of our newlywed fly couple that the name of the hotel wasn’t enough to warn them. The opening scene in which the spider sings a song while we see trapped flies screaming for their lives is certainly enough to get this one classified as a horror cartoon of sorts. And, truth be told, it’s pretty much played for thrills rather than laughs, though there are moments of whimsy. I can’t help but notice that our spider is short a couple of his legs, but that’s a minor quibble. This one passes muster.