THE MILLION EYES OF SUMURU (1967)
Article 2086 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 12-1-2006
Posting Date: 4-29-2007
Directed by Lindsay Shonteff
Featuring Frankie Avalon, George Nader, Shirley Eaton

A secret agent tries to take on Sumuru, the head of a female cult that intends to use assassination to take over the world.

Poor George Nader! Not only is he saddled here with some of the lamest comic one-liners ever written, but he also receives lower billing than Frankie Avalon, who plays what amounts to (for all practical purposes) his sidekick. Not only that, most of the audience is probably too busy ogling the beautiful women to pay any attention to him, and then Klaus Kinski comes along in a cameo and outacts the rest of the cast. Well, at least he doesn’t have a line as bad as Frankie’s about whether it’s time to sing a song now. I found it very hard to take this movie seriously due to the nonstop barrage of one-liners, and the fact that the one-liners were pretty bad only made it worse. Still, I think it’s a little better than its sequel, FUTURE WOMEN; yes, it’s a much more conventional movie than that one was, but at least when it’s time for the action sequences, you get action sequences, and there’s a good surprise moment in the first couple of minutes. Beyond that, this is faux Fu Manchu at its lamest.