Month: June 2015

Dracula: The Dirty Old Man (1969)

DRACULA: THE DIRTY OLD MAN (1969)
Article #635 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 12-10-2002
Posting Date: 5-5-2003

Dracula takes control of a man and causes him to turn into a werewolf (named Irving Jackalman) to kidnap nubile young women for his pleasure.

I wish I could say a simple perusal of the title of this particular movie would tell you everything about what to expect, but after subjecting myself to this movie, I’m afraid the title doesn’t begin to do it “justice”. Yes, it’s a comedy, and it’s a skinflick; that much you’d be able to figure out. But it looks for all the world as if the movie was originally shot to be taken more or less seriously, and then had a new soundtrack slapped onto it by two ad-libbing Jewish comedians while a light jazz combo plays in the background. Surprisingly, it actually got a couple laughs out of me; once, at the very beginning where a narrator waxes on endlessly about ‘the blue mountain behind the blue mountain behind the blue mountain” (among other things) that is an incoherent parody of “I remember how it all started…” narrative openings of movies, and a later sequence in which the narrator insists on telling you exactly what his character is doing at the moment he’s doing it (“I got out of the car, closed the door,” etc.). It goes downhill from there, as it begins to emphasize the unconvincing gore and the sex scenes, though it still does pull off the occasional gag. Still, the primary question I’m left with after watching this thing is this; which is worse, the fake bat or the werewolf costume? Make sure you send the kiddies to bed before dropping this one into your DVD player.

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Zombies of Mora Tau (1957)

ZOMBIES OF MORA TAU (1957)
Article #634 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12-9-2002
Posting date: 5-4-2003

Adventurers attempt to lay their hands on diamonds in an underwater ship that is under guard by zombies.

This is perhaps the first movie with underwater zombies, a fairly small subgenre, to be sure. Somehow, this is fitting; the movie has the languid, lethargic pace of zombies walking underwater. It is produced by Sam Katzman, directed by Edward L. Cahn, and features Gregg Palmer, Alison Hayes, Gene Roth and Morris Ankrum. Though these names hardly portend great star power, they do give the movie a strong B-Movie appeal, which is a good thing. This appeal may explain why I never quite found myself bored, despite the slowness of the pace and the fairly mundane plot; seeing all these familiar faces and names kept me relaxed and in a good frame of mind for the movie’s seventy minutes of running time. Sometimes, it just helps to like this type of movie.

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You Never Can Tell (1951)

YOU NEVER CAN TELL (1951)
Article #633 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12-8-2002
Posting date: 5-3-2003

A dog inherits a fortune, and then is poisoned. He comes back from the dead as a private detective in order to solve his own murder.

There’s something about the above description that sets warning lights off in my head telling me that this could end up being insufferably cute or insufferably stupid. Actually, it ends up as neither, and part of the reason is that the private detective and his assistant (who used to be a horse) at least behave with a certain realization that they will call too much attention to themselves if they behave overly much like the animals they are; when the detective gets into a cab at one point, I was afraid we were going to have a shot of him sticking his head out the window with his tongue flapping in the wind. Instead, it’s just this kind of slapstick overkill the movie avoids. Make no mistake; the movie does depend on the central premise for a lot of its gag (the detective eats kibble, and the assistant likes to go the races), but it does so with a touch of wry wit rather than with a bludgeon. It’s a good thing it handles itself with a light touch; the story itself is pretty weak, with an ending that relies overly on coincidence rather than any sort of logic. Nonetheless, this is one of those movies that, though it is no classic by any means, is a lot better than it could have been. Dick Powell is the detective. It was remade in reverse years later by with Chevy Chase. Incidentally, the movie features a sequence in a world of the afterlife called “Beastatory” that is easily the bizarrest scene in the movie.

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The Vampire’s Ghost (1945)

THE VAMPIRE’S GHOST (1945)
Article #632 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12-7-2002
Posting date: 5-2-2003

An African village is the site of several unexplained murders. The natives believe a vampire is amongst them, and there is; a gambler by the name of Fallon.

When is a Lewton movie not a Lewton movie? When it came from Republic rather than RKO and was directed by Lesley Selander. Actually, Lewton had nothing to do with this movie, but despite the fact that the movie lacks Lewton’s trademark ambiguity (there is no doubt that we are dealing with a real vampire), in mood and poetry it reminds me of nothing else. The direction is merely ordinary, but there is an exquisite sadness about the unusually well-written script (by Leigh Brackett), and a memorable performance by John Abbott as Fallon, whose unusual looks and mesmerizing eyes make him an ideal actor for his role. Fallon makes for an interesting vampire; rather than isolating himself from the rest of the world, he actually seems to be a member of the community and interacts with those around him on a daily basis. Abbott’s refusal to resort to melodrama results in him underplaying the role, and he manages to invest his character with a wonderful sense of world-weariness that I’ve found in no other classic vampire movie that I’ve seen. There are memorable moments; a scene where he hypnotizes a man to leave his body under the full moon, and a jarring sequence involving a mirror both come to mind. I didn’t expect much from this movie going in, but it turned out to be one of the most unexpected (and pleasant) surprises I’ve run into recently.

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Untamed Women (1952)

UNTAMED WOMEN (1952)
Article #631 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12-6-2002
Posting date: 5-1-2003

Survivors of a downed military plane find themselves on an uncharted island with a tribe of beautiful women without men.

It may well be that the above description will make the movie sound delectable to those with a taste for such things, especially if I mention that it throws in a slurpasaur for good measure. Think of it as something like CAT WOMEN OF THE MOON or FIRE MAIDENS FROM OUTER SPACE in a lost world rather than another planet, and you get the picture. Unfortunately, this movie is just as lively as those are, and that is not a recommendation. Still, the movie is worth watching to hear one of the great howler lines of all time, namely: “Shoot anything with hair on it that moves!” It also features Lyle Talbot, a wisecracking kid from Brooklyn, a volcano, and one of those phantom hairdressers hidden in a cave somewhere to keep the women looking their best. It’s a little better than WILD WOMEN OF WONGO. You take it from there.

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Return of the Fly (1959)

RETURN OF THE FLY (1959)
Article #630 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12-5-2002
Posting date: 4-30-2003

The son of a scientist who was transformed into a half man/half-fly follows in the footprints of his father by continuing his experiments.

I’ve always had a fondness for the original THE FLY; the movie had strong characters, a compelling sense of mystery, and an emotionally resonant story. This immediate sequel retains some of the basic plot elements, but throws out the above qualities and replaces them with stock situations; there is no mystery, the characters are ordinary, and the story is routine. Vincent Price is the only actor returning from the original, but he’s consigned to a fairly uninteresting role. The acting and the effects aren’t bad, there are some memorable images, and those who prefer more conventional and predictable stories may even prefer this one to the original. Me, I miss the inner conflicts that fleshed out the character of the monster from the first movie; this one is just a typical marauding monster once it cuts loose. It’s not a bad movie by any means, but it is several steps down from the original.

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Reptilicus (1961)

REPTILICUS (1961)
Article #629 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12-4-2002
Posting date: 4-29-2003

A reptilian monster with the ability to regenerate itself attacks the beautiful city of Copenhagen in Denmark, where tourists can hear beautiful songs like “Tivoli Nights” and enjoy the nightlife and…sorry, I seem to have gotten off the track.

Some thoughts on Reptilicus.

1. Big, bulky monsters are scarier than weedy stringbeans with tiny arms.

2. There is a point in this movie where people are urged not to panic. This is followed by a succession of montages in which giant guns are pointed straight at the viewer’s eyes. This is not the best way to quell panic.

3. The janitor in this movie is proof positive that every country has its own Jim Varney.

4. The most impressive scene in the movie involves a huge crowd of people (every extra in Denmark?) running across a drawbridge.

5. The least impressive scene is any scene with special effects.

6. Most enduring lesson to be learned from this movie; never give in to the temptation to observe your lunch under a microscope.

7. The Danish speak a lot slower than the Japanese, which makes dubbing them a little clunkier. Also, you would have been able to tell this movie was dubbed even if the words had matched the movement of the mouths; it just never sounds like the words were being spoken in the place where you see them being said.

8. Despite a long travelogue sequence, I still have no real desire to see the beautiful city of Copenhagen.

9. AIP removed all scenes of Reptilicus flying because they weren’t convincing. Instead, they added animation of green acid slime spewing out the mouth of Reptilicus. If this is more convincing than the flying sequences, then I want to see those flying sequences. They also cut a scene of the Janitor singing a song with a bunch of children.

10. Reptilicus dies at the end of this movie, though the janitor and that idiot who runs the drawbridge are left alive and breathing. Is there no justice?

And finally, despite a plot element that promises otherwise, there was no sequel.

Yet.

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Atom Man Vs. Superman (1950)

ATOM MAN VS. SUPERMAN (1950)
(Serial)
Article #628 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12-3-2002
Posting date: 4-28-2003

Superman faces the threat of a technological genius named Atom Man, who is, of course, none other than Lex Luthor in disguise.

One advantage of basing a serial on a well-known comic book is that you have an instantly recognizable cast of characters from square one; I have no trouble with confusing characters in this one (a common problem I’ve encountered with serials). Most of the flying effects are done via cartoon animation, which is somewhat jarring, but you get used to it well enough. It’s loaded with cheating cliffhangers, but at least they aren’t just the “man sees the car is going over a cliff and bails out at the last moment” type; in fact, some of them are quite clever. It’s well acted all around, with Kirk Alyn a very appealing Superman, and Lyle Talbot having a fun time as Lex Luthor. I found it very good for a serial from the fifties.

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The Raven (1963)

THE RAVEN (1963)
Article #627 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12/2/2002
Posting date: 4/27/2003

A meek magician finds himself drawn into a battle with an evil sorcerer.

This is the third movie I’ve covered supposedly based on this Edgar Allan Poe poem. Three more different movies you couldn’t find; the first was a partial biography of Poe himself, the second a nasty horror movie with Bela Lugosi and Boris Karloff, and this one, a fantasy/comedy (with horror elements) with Vincent Price, Peter Lorre and (again) Boris Karloff. This is one of Corman’s Poe movies that I quite like; not only is it great to see three masters at work together like this, but by being more of a work of fantasy than one of horror, it doesn’t borrow overly much from Corman’s other Poe movies (there’s not a single premature burial subplot to be found). The nice thing is that all three stars have roles of equal weight and interest, and they are all excellent. In fact, it’s hard to pick a favorite; I lean towards Karloff, but Lorre is great, too, and Price (in the atypical role of the hero) equally so. The special effects aren’t quite up to the ambitions of the story, especially during the final sorcerer’s duel sequence (though a sequence involving a spear is quite effective), and the comedy isn’t quite as funny as it could have been, but the charm of the movie overrides these problems. Hazel Court also looks quite stunning here, and Jack Nicholson is also here, giving a much better performance than he would in THE TERROR. If this movie were in public domain and in release by cheapie video companies, I’ll leave it to you to guess who would be given top billing on the package.

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Paranoiac (1963)

PARANOIAC (1963)
Article #626 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 12/1/2002
Posting date: 4/26/2003

A woman thinks she is going crazy because she keeps seeing her dead brother. Then when a man who resembles her brother shows up, her mother and other brother become suspicious.

This is another variation on PSYCHO, and though it’s hardly terrible, it is very disappointing. One of the most striking things about PSYCHO is the performance of Anthony Perkins, who plays a character with a full range of human emotions; an equivalent character here is played by Oliver Reed, but the only emotion he seems to give his character is one of violent intensity, and though he is quite good at displaying this emotion, it becomes tedious over the full length of the movie. It’s also problematic in that it leaves the character with no real surprises, and that’s a problem that extends to almost everyone in this movie; you can pick out the people who are really mad, the one who only thinks they’re mad, and the one who is kind-hearted and compassionate easily, and though this would not be a problem in many movies, it short-circuits one that is trying to rely on unexpected plot twists and surprising developments. As it is, nothing in this movie surprises me, which is certainly something I could never say about PSYCHO. It’s also why I like PSYCHO so much better.

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