PREHISTORIC WOMEN (1950)
Article #111 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing date: 7-5-2001
Posting date: 11-18-2001

A group of prehistoric women dance themselves to exhaustion during the full moon. The matriarch can tell by this that they need to get some men into the tribe (apparently their cosmetician and hairdresser, whose existences I merely deduce from the evidence I see, do not qualify). They capture some men and keep them prisoner using their pet panther to keep them in line. However, when one of the men kills the panther, the balance of power shifts, and the men rule the women. They decide to take them back to their caves, but on the way they have to join forces to fight a turkey (the narrator calls it a dragon, but I’m calling it as I see it) and a giant called the Gwadi.

SPOILER

At the end, they decide to join forces and form a tribe of their own, and much (offscreen) enjoyment is had by all. No dinosaurs appear, not even a slurpasaur (and the dragon/turkey doesn’t count).

END OF SPOILER

Usually, I don’t go into this elaborate of a plot description, but there are just some movies that are best described that way; it tells you more about the movie than any commentary by me ever could. The lack of dinosaurs should give you a clue as to what aspect of caveman movies this one is going to emphasize, but be aware that it would get no more than the mildest of PG ratings nowadays.

This is what happens when you make a caveman movie without dinosaurs.

Also, beware narrators; you know you’re watching a bad movie when the narrator is telling you things that you can see with your own two eyes.