The Golden Beetle (1907)

THE GOLDEN BEETLE (1907)
aka LE SCARABEE D’OR
Article 2061 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 11-5-2006
Posting Date: 4-4-2007
Directed by Segundo de Chomon
Cast Unknown

A magician finds a golden beetle and casts it into a cauldron. It turns into a winged woman who creates a spectacular fountain, and then has the magician cast into a cauldron.

If you get a chance to see this silent short, try to find the hand-tinted version; it is colored exquisitely, especially during the fountain sequence. Plotwise it’s pretty much the same sort of thing that Melies does, but if it lacks the wit of Melies, it does have a nice sense of poetry that Melies never attained. I suspect that this was one of the reasons that Melies eventually fell into disfavor; he was a cinema trickster rather than a full-blown movie director, and he failed to grow as new techniques for story-telling developed. This short gives just a hint of some of the directions he could have gone with his work.

 

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The Damnation of Faust (1903)

THE DAMNATION OF FAUST (1903)
aka FAUST, LA DAMNATION DE FAUST, FAUST AUX ENFERS
Article 2060 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 11-4-2006
Posting Date: 4-3-2007
Directed by Georges Melies
Cast Unknown (though I’m betting that’s Melies himself as Mephistopheles)

Faust goes to hell. Faust goes directly to hell. He does not pass go. He does not collect $200.

Do you get tired with the endless philosophizing in the Goethe’s Faust story and just wish they would get to the point where he’s dragged into hell? If so, this is the version of the story for you. Unlike yesterday’s scam, here’s a movie that earns its place in the canon of Fantastic cinema. Faust encounters all sorts of horrors on his trip, including a multi-tentacled creature, a gaggle of devils in their underwear (hey, it’s hot down there), and, worst of all, a bunch of ballerinas and marching women with mops; I don’t know about you, but I’m quaking in my boots. Jonathan Edwards (author of “Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God”), eat your heart out; these are horrors even you couldn’t imagine. And it only runs about four minutes.

Postscript -Thanks to Doctor Kiss for the clarification on the exact year on this one.

 

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Ella Lola, a la Trilby (1898)

ELLA LOLA, A LA TRILBY (1898)
Article 2059 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 11-3-2006
Posting Date: 4-2-2007
Director Unknown
Featuring Ella Lola

Ella Lola performs a dance based on the character of Trilby. She twirls around and kicks her bare feet into the air. The movie ends.

This is officially now the earliest movie I’ve covered for this series. It is also a cheat – other than the fact that the character on which Ella Lola based her dance is from a story with certain horrific overtones, there is no fantastic content here. Which brings up an interesting point; do movies whose only fantastic content comes from association to a story that contains some qualify? I’d say not myself, but it’s easy to see why this movie got included in the list.

At least Melies would have turned her into a skeleton.

 

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Long Distance Wireless Photography (1908)

LONG DISTANCE WIRELESS PHOTOGRAPHY (1908)
Article 2058 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 11-2-2006
Posting Date: 4-1-2007
Directed by Georges Melies
Featuring Georges Melies

An elderly couple visits an innovative photographer whose larger-than-life photographs come alive. All is fine until the old man decides to have his picture taken, and then…

More special effects silliness from Melies here. I’m not sure where the “long-distance” comes into play here; all of his photographs are of people or things right in the studio. Still, the vision of the old man’s face (which looks like that of a manic monkey puppet) is pretty memorable, and it’s full of fun-looking machinery. And remember to keep your fingers out of the electrical machinery!

 

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The Fabulous Joe (1947)

THE FABULOUS JOE (1947)
Article 2057 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 11-1-2006
Posting Date: 3-31-2007
Directed by Harve Foster
Featuring Walter Abel, Margot Grahame, Marie Wilson

A businessman is surprised to discover that a dog he inherited can talk. The dog then proceeds to help him with his personal problems.

Given the fact that yesterday’s movie was THE DOG FACTORY, it seems like we’re on a run of canine films here. This Hal Roach Jr. production mines the same sort of laughs that the “Francis, the Talking Mule” do, though, for my money, this one is funnier. There are several reasons for this. One is that the movie is less bland; in fact, it gets rather racy at times, with part of the plot revolving around a bedroom farce situation in which a married man must hide a partially clothed woman from his wife and her relatives and friends. Another is that it doesn’t belabor the obvious joke; there is only one scene here where our hapless hero finds himself having to convince other people that the dog talks. And another is that, with a running time under an hour, it doesn’t overstay its welcome. It’s silly and dumb, but good for a few fun laughs. My favorite scene involves the mixing of a drink called “The Mystery Gardenia”.

 

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Dog Factory (1904)

DOG FACTORY (1904)
Article 2056 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-31-2006
Posting Date: 3-30-2007
Director Unknown
Cast Unknown

Enterprising businessmen maintain a thriving business turning dogs into sausages – and back again.

The concept of a machine that would turn dogs into sausages actually pops up a few times in early cinema. Apparently, this was a common theme in vaudeville at the time as well. Apparently, turning a dog into sausages doesn’t hurt him, and if you want him back, just pop the sausages back in and voila! Instant Dog. This movie stretches the idea to four minutes and pretty much exhausts the premise. My favorite touch – the sausages are hung on several hooks in the shop, each marked with the breed of dog the sausage came from.

Ahh, the joys of early movie-making…

 

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Bob’s Electric Theater (1906)

BOB’S ELECTRIC THEATER (1906)
aka LE THEATRE DE BOB
Article 2055 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-30-2006
Posting Date: 3-29-2007
Directed by Segundo de Chomon
Featuring Three Kids, Two Fighting Puppets, and a Tumbling Vaudevillian Puppet with Big Feet

Three kids decide to keep themselves entertained by watching a four act play on Bob’s Electric Theater.

Act 1 – Two puppets come out. They fight.
Act 2 – Two puppets come out. They fight.
Act 3 – Two puppets come out. They fight.
Act 4 – A tumbling vaudevillian puppet with big feet comes out. He tumbles.

This early work of stop-motion animation is fairly entertaining as an early example of that sort of thing, and the hand tinting is quite charming. The plot needs a little work, though, despite the unforeseeable twist in act four. I wonder if Ken’s Electric Theater is any better. Or maybe Hubie’s Electric Theater down the block.

Today, children have television and video games.

I’ll leave it to you to decide if this is progress.

 

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The Helicopter Spies (1968)

THE HELICOPTER SPIES (1968)
Edited from episodes of “The Man From U.N.C.L.E.”
Article 2054 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-29-2006
Posting Date: 3-28-2007
Directed by Boris Sagal
Featuring Robert Vaughn, David McCallum, Carol Lynley

Two secret agents try to prevent a weapon called the Thermal Prism from being used to take over the world.

Despite the fact that I’m not a particular fan of the James Bond series, I find myself quite liking some of the TV shows that were inspired by it. I didn’t see this show much during its original run, but I’ve enjoyed seeing some of the movies made out of it, and I think it’s a good thing that they usually did this with two-part episodes that told whole stories rather than trying to glue two different stories together. This one is quite fun and has an interesting assortment of guest stars, including John Dehner, Carol Lynley, Julie London and John Carradine (who, as a high priest of a cult, will only speak when his cult has gained control of the world). H. M. Wynant is also a lot of fun as a group of acrobat brothers who just happen to all look alike; I look forward to seeing him in Larry Blamire’s upcoming movie TRAIL OF THE SCREAMING FOREHEAD. However, I do take issue with the title of the movie; though there are a couple of scenes with helicopters in the movie, they play no significant role in the proceedings; it’s almost as if the person who titled it, saw the first two minutes, decided that since it was a scene of two spies in a helicopter, he decided to call it THE HELICOPTER SPIES. Imagine if other movies titled themselves that way.

CITIZEN KANE – THE DEAD MAN’S PAPERWEIGHT
THE WIZARD OF OZ – FEEDING PIGS IN KANSAS
THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN – BYRON VISITS THE SHELLEYS
KING KONG – THE ACTRESS HUNT

You can add your own.

 

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El Topo (1970)

EL TOPO (1970)
aka THE MOLE
Article 2053 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-28-2006
Posting Date: 3-27-2007
Directed by Alejandro Jodorowsky
Featuring Alejandro Jodorowsky, Brontis Jodorowsky, Jose Legarreta

A man wanders the desert with a naked child. He deserts the child for a woman who urges him to find and defeat four masters in the desert.

This is one of those unique, personal, and somewhat abstract films that end up falling under the fantastic categories simply because the events are so bizarre that it ends up having fantastic elements almost by accident. In this case, some of the masters in the desert have supernatural powers, and the main character is able to draw water out of stones (just one of many religious references). It was the first movie to really gain fame as a midnight movie, and for this reason alone it is historically interesting.

Still, I find it a little difficult to cover movies like this. It’s too personal for me to really pretend that I understand it enough to make much in the way of meaningful commentary, and usually what I end up doing is giving my gut-level and personal reaction to it (which, given that the movie is very personal in the first place, makes it somehow appropriate). Somehow, I sense that this movie isn’t quite as complex and impenetrable as it might seem; certainly, the religious references seem like definite starting points for exploration. But as far as personal cinematic statements go, I don’t find it quite as compelling as some others I’ve seen; I think that I would be more likely to watch ERASERHEAD or THE TESTAMENT OF ORPHEUS (both of which strike me as somewhat more unique and sincere) than this one. At heart, this movie feels like a combination of spaghetti western, samurai film and religious epic, and somehow the fact that those same elements can also lead you fairly close to the TV show “Kung Fu” makes it all seem a little less impressive. Still, I did find it a consistently interesting watch.

 

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Doctor Dolittle (1967)

DOCTOR DOLITTLE (1967)
Article 2052 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-27-2006
Posting Date: 3-26-2007
Directed by Richard Fleischer
Featuring Rex Harrison, Samantha Eggar, Anthony Newley

A veterinarian who can talk to animals sets out on a quest to find a giant pink sea snail.

A big-budget musical version of a children’s classic? I went into this one expecting an exercise in excess on the level of CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG, but such is definitely not the case. This movie projects an air of genteel whimsy, and it never once lets excess destroy this air. Yet therein lies the problem; genteel whimsy is not compelling or exciting, and if a movie is going to maintain interest level over a two-and-a-half-hour running time, it needs something compelling and exciting. But the songs (which aren’t particularly strong in the first place) are underplayed and muted, the dancing is virtually nonexistent (I think the pushme-pullyu has a few steps), the plot is extremely slight, the animals are surprisingly dull (Chee-Chee the chimp doesn’t engage in a single animal antic throughout the movie, and does Gip the dog do anything?), and the crowd scenes mostly have people standing around or doing uninteresting things). The only scene that really tries to instill any energy into the proceedings is an early scene that illustrates why the doctor abandoned his practice on humans, and, unless you really think a series of gags that mostly involve people stepping on the foot of a man with gout to be the height of hilarity, the scene is awful. The end result is that the movie pays the price of avoiding energy and excitement; it becomes terribly dull for much of its running time, despite the fact that it maintains its genteel whimsy. Still, I suspect that, whatever the flaws of this movie, I’d still prefer it to the 1998 Eddie Murphy remake.

 

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