Month: September 2017

Aventura al centro de la Tierra (1965)

AVENTURA AL CENTRO DE LA TIERRA (1965)
aka Adventure at the Center of the Earth
Article 2232 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-26-2007
Posting Date: 9-22-2007
Directed by Alfredo B. Cravenna
Featuring Kitty de Hoyos, Javier Solis, Columba Dominguez

Adventurers go down into the earth to face monsters.

Once again, I find myself watching a Mexican movie without the benefit of dubbing or subtitles, so the plot subtleties are lost on me. However, since this movie gives us plenty of monsters on the loose, there’s still some fun to be had here. In fact, it looks like our adventurers prepared for the journey by prehistoric monster footage; they watch a film featuring as much dinosaur stock footage as they could get their hands on, including Ignatz and Rumsford engaged in their battle from ONE MILLION B.C ., as well as the slow-moving dinos from UNKNOWN ISLAND . There’s also some primitive stop-motion dinos and puppet ones; after all, dinosaurs come in all shapes and sizes. Underground they face off against a big cyclops lizard and a fanged bat creature, who is not entirely unsympathetic. It’s a lot of fun, though it’s another movie that looks like real animals were hurt in the making of it; at one point, they set fire to a pit of snakes, and it doesn’t look like special effects. However, the cardboard bats that terrorize a man crossing a rope over a lava pit definitely do look like special effects, if not particularly special ones. All in all, it was fairly entertaining.

 

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The Two Little Bears (1961)

THE TWO LITTLE BEARS (1961)
Article 2231 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-25-2007
Posting Date: 9-21-2007
Directed by Randall Hood
Featuring Eddie Albert, Jane Wyatt, Soupy Sales

Two little boys want to become bears, much to the consternation of their teacher and their father, the principal of the school. They meet a fortuneteller who tells them they can turn into bears if they put on bear costumes, rub themselves with a salve, and say a witch’s curse. They do so, and discover that it works.

Had I known the basic plot of the movie, taken the time to look at it’s 4.6 average rating on IMDB, and known that it featured cutesy songs by Brenda Lee, I might well have prepared for the worst when I sat down to watch this. As it was, I went into it blind, and instead, I found myself rather taken by the cast, which featured Eddie Albert, Jane Wyatt, Soupy Sales, Butch Patrick, Nancy Kulp and Milton Parsons. Even the potentially saccharine “Honey Bear” song warbled by Miss Lee didn’t drive me off, probably because I found it an easier song to bear with than the one that opened THE WIZARD OF BAGHDAD the other day. As a result, I found myself quite charmed by this one; no, it’s far from a classic, but it’s unpretentious, has a nice sense of gentle magic to it, and in its own ingenuous way it mines some of the same childhood feelings as the superior THE CURSE OF THE CAT PEOPLE . All in all, I liked this one, though it may be simply because it hit me in the right mood.

 

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Superbeast (1972)

SUPERBEAST (1972)
Article 2230 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-24-2007
Posting Date: 9-20-2007
Directed by George Schenck
Featuring Antoinette Bower, Craig Littler, Harry Lauter

A female pathologist investigates the death of a strange, brutish man. Her investigation leads her to the Philippines, where she encounters a scientist engaged in strange experiments and a big game hunter with his own agenda.

The basic premise of this one holds some promise; it’s kind of an ISLAND OF LOST SOULS in reverse crossed with THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME . So why does this movie almost send the viewer into a coma? It’s not the acting; all of the actors seem quite competent to me. The location footage is also very watchable. No, the culprits here are the script, the direction, and the musical score. It’s one of those movies that tries to be mysterious but merely comes across as being annoyingly coy about plot points that become fairly obvious. Furthermore, the movie has a deadening pace; for every minute of action or conversation, there seems to be two minutes of people just walking around. The score is a very one note affair; it tries to be moody and evocative, but drones on and on without any change, even when the action requires it. As a result, we have a movie that manages to aggressively avoid being either atmospheric or suspenseful; in fact, it’s anti-suspenseful; I’d imagine it must be difficult to have a scene where two people go over a waterfall in a canoe that generates less suspense than watching paint dry. Only toward the end of the movie does the movie generate any life, and by then it is far too late. For insomniacs only.

 

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The Wizard of Baghdad (1960)

THE WIZARD OF BAGHDAD (1960)
Article 2229 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-23-2007
Posting Date: 9-19-2007
Directed by George Sherman
Featuring Dick Shawn, Diane Baker, Barry Coe

A genie has his powers taken away when he fails to prevent the assassination of a sultan, which results in the separation of two children who are supposed to be pledged in marriage. In order to get his powers back, he tries to reunite the children (who have now grown to adulthood), but he can’t find the man, and the woman has been promised to marry a usurper to the throne.

I’ve always assumed that the rash of Arabian Nights movies during the forties and fifties was fallout from the popularity of the excellent THE THIEF OF BAGDAD from 1940. Though any one of these movies may be acceptable on its own terms, taken as a whole, the lack of imagination and the endless regurgitation of the same plot make them for repetitive viewing nowadays. Now, if I had to make an Arabian Nights movie with the same recycled plot, here are some of the things I would not do.

1) Get budget-conscious Sam Katzman to produce it.

2) Turn it into a musical comedy.

3) Add a Mr. Ed-style talking horse.

4) Have some of the action take place in the world’s biggest outhouse.

All right, Disney managed to do number 2 with their animated version of ALADDIN (and possibly 3; I can’t remember whether the genie turns into a talking horse at some point, but he turns into so many things I wouldn’t be surprised if he had). Also, I’m not sure a movie with only two songs can be called a musical, but the opening one ( called “Eenie Meeny Genie” ) is horrendous enough to give me nightmares for a week. Also, I’m exaggerating about the giant outhouse; it’s actually a tavern of some sort, but any place with a big wooden door that has a crescent moon on the front is bound to to be mistaken for one. Dick Shawn ( who is perhaps most famous for playing the lead actor in “Springtime for Hitler” in the original version of THE PRODUCERS) is a good actor / singer, but the songs and the jokes he’s given here just don’t cut it. The action sequences are fairly decent, and, despite the very wooden acting and low energy, it occasionally sparks some interest in the dramatic moments. Incidentally, Sinbad, Omar Khayyam and Aladdin (played by Bill Mumy) pop up for short cameos. Still, with all the Arabian Nights adventures out there, there’s little reason to settle for this one.

 

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The Telephone Book (1971)

THE TELEPHONE BOOK (1971)
Article 2228 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-22-2007
Posting Date: 9-18-2007
Directed by Nelson Lyon
Featuring Sarah Kennedy, Norman Rose, Roger C. Carmel

When a woman receives an unusually effective obscene phone call, she becomes intent on tracking down and meeting the man. All she knows is that his name is John Smith and he lives in Manhattan. She begins calling all of the John Smiths in the telephone book to find him.

First of all, let’s get the fantastic content out of the way. The only content of that sort here is found in the animated sequences that pop up during the climax of the movie; they’re outrageous and could certainly be classified as obscene to some. For a while, I wondered if the movie was going to slip into science fiction when the phone caller, while telling the story of his life, begins to talk about having trained to be an astronaut, but such is not the case. I also thought the movie could turn towards horror before it was all over; after all, it’s quite possible our obscene phone caller could be a serial killer as well, but such is not the case.

To be quite frank, this movie hovers on a strange border between art film, comedy and softcore pornography, and walks it surprisingly well; it actually manages to succeed somewhat as all three. In this context, it’s a little surprised to see names I was familiar with; Roger C. Carmel is known for playing Mudd in a couple of “Star Trek” episodes, and Barry Morse was a regular on “Space 1999”. The Carmel sequence is the funniest in the movie; as an exhibitionist analyst who gets an unexpected comeuppance, he is quite hilarious. Norman Rose plays the obscene phone caller, and his performance is quite impressive, too; given the fact that we never see his complete face (unless he is one of the obscene phone callers who are interviewed during the movie, as there is one who could well be him), and that he wears a pig mask throughout all of his scenes with Sarah Kennedy, he manages to somehow avoid coming off as a repellent creep and instead catches our interest as a human being, which is no mean feat. I was surprisingly taken with this movie, though it is certainly not for everyone. It has plenty of nudity and some simulated sex, but I think, for all that, it manages to avoid being mere exploitation. The movie also features Jill Clayburgh in a small role, and Andy Warhol regulars Ondine and Ultra Violet.

 

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The Werewolf vs. the Vampire Women (1973)

THE WEREWOLF VS. THE VAMPIRE WOMEN (1973)
aka La Noche de Walpurgis
Article 2227 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-21-2007
Posting Date: 9-17-2007
Directed by Leon Klimovsky
Featuring Jacinta Molina (Paul Naschy), Gaby Fuchs, Barbara Capell

When the wolfman is resurrected by two coroners, he takes refuge in a country home. When he comes upon two stranded women, he offers to help them investigate the burial site of a woman who was believed to be a vampiress. They find the grave, but accidentally revive her.

I think one of the appeals of the Paul Naschy films to horror fans is that he pursued one concept of the Universal horrors that had largely been left untouched for years (except in kaiju, that is), and that was the concept of having multiple monsters of different types squaring off against each other. Even in the first Hombre Lobo movie, they threw vampires into the werewolf mix, and here they are, at it again. It’s not a great movie, and the faded colors and dubbing in my public domain copy don’t help much; I’ve heard the DVD version titled WEREWOLF SHADOW is much better. Nonetheless, it is entertaining enough, if fairly routine, and it certainly doesn’t stint on the atmosphere. It’s the usual pattern; Naschy plays a heroic monster, there’s a goodly amount of gore and sex; you pretty much know what you’ll be getting. There’s even a zombie monk and a sleazy servant to add to the proceedings; you know the latter is no good when the woman asks him to take her to the post office, and instead, he offers to take her to a butcher shop and a cemetery. The ending is a bit of a disappointment; after all the talk about Walpurgis night, the monsters don’t seem particularly more dangerous than they were throughout the movie when that time comes.

 

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The Water Babies (1978)

THE WATER BABIES (1978)
Article 2226 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-20-2007
Posting Date: 9-16-2007
Directed by Lionel Jeffries
Featuring James Mason, Bernard Cribbins, Billie Whitelaw

A poor boy finds himself accused of being a thief while working as a chimney sweep at a country mansion. He jumps into a stream to escape his pursuers and finds himself in an underwater kingdom. In order to escape, he must find the Water Babies and then meet the Kraken.

The DVD cover makes this children’s fantasy look as if it’s going to be one of those treacly overcute productions – all right for young children but almost unwatchable for adults. Well, don’t trust DVD covers; the first scenes of this movie take place in a grimy, somewhat brutal London market that looks like something out of Dickens at his bleakest. The fact that our hero is a forced apprentice to a brutish chimney sweep (James Mason in an unexpected role) and his sniveling assistant (Bernard Cribbins) only underscores the Dickens similarity. No, this movie is not overly cute, but it isn’t quite satisfying either; despite some good and very interesting moments, the movie seems a bit jittery and off-putting. The first thirty minutes and the last fifteen minutes are live-action, but the middle half of the movie is animated, and largely follows the plot of THE WIZARD OF OZ ; a child and his dog find themselves in a strange land, they go on a journey and meet three companions, ask a favor from a powerful god-figure and are set on a task to defeat some villain to prove their worth. There’s really only two songs, but fortunately, the central one that pops up repeatedly is very good. Unfortunately, the animation, most of which seems to have been done by Russian animators, has a jerky, unpleasant feel to it that takes away somewhat from my enjoyment of the movie. The best thing about the movie is Billie Whitelaw, who, though she seems to play several roles, may actually be the manifestation of one person, and whose presence has a hard-to-define power over the proceedings; if anything makes me want to seek out the Charles Kingsley book on which the movie was based, it is her presence, as I’d be hoping that the book would explain it more fully. The cast also features David Tomlinson, and Doctor Who’s Jon Pertwee provides one of character voices.

 

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Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women (1968)

VOYAGE TO THE PLANET OF PREHISTORIC WOMEN (1968)
Article 2225 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-19-2007
Posting Date: 9-15-2007
Directed by Peter Bogdanovich
Featuring Mamie Van Doren, Mary Marr, Paige Lee

A group of astronauts come to Venus to explore. A group of telepathic female Venusians who worship a pterodactyl try to destroy them.

This is what amounts to Peter Bogdanovich’s first theatrical film, in which he took (or was given) the Russian science fiction epic PLANETA BUR, edited in footage of beautiful Venusians in seashell bikini tops, added a lot of dubbing and narration, and voila! instant movie. The movie isn’t totally useless, largely because PLANETA BUR has some nice moments to it; the scene with the robot in the lava is the most memorable, but I also like the killer plant and the final revelation about the rock. The new footage is pretty bad, but sometimes memorable in its own right; the scenes where they hold a funeral for their pterodactyl god (who looks pretty rubbery and may be the best competitor with the monster in THE GIANT CLAW for the goofiest cinematic flying beastie) and the one where they find a new god qualify. Still, it’s fairly easy to find copies of PLANETA BUR anymore, so this version may be unnecessary, unless you absolutely have to see Mamie Van Doren in the seashell bikini top.

Incidentally, this movie is part of a group of three from the mid -to-late sixties which I associate with each other because it’s so easy to get them confused. The other two movies are VOYAGE TO THE PREHISTORIC PLANET, and WOMEN OF THE PREHISTORIC PLANET. To further complicate things, one of these movies also makes extensive use of footage from PLANETA BUR. Talk about recycling…

 

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The Unearthly (1957)

THE UNEARTHLY (1957)
Article 2224 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-18-2007
Posting Date: 9-14-2007
Directed by Boris Petroff
Featuring John Carradine, Allison Hayes, Myron Healey

A doctor is experimenting with a gland that can give eternal life, but the people on whom he experiments all turn into monstrous freaks.

This rather cheap, plodding horror film doesn’t have much of a reputation, and, other than the memorable ending, it is pretty forgettable. The performances are uneven. On the plus side, John Carradine is rather restrained, the secondary characters are decently done, and Tor Johnson does a good job (for Tor, that is). Tor even has what may be his most memorable screen line, “Time for go to bed!”. I’m less taken with some of the other performances; Myron Healey would have been acceptable if he’d actually acted like the dangerous murderer that people are supposed to believe he is, and Allison Hayes does little more than fill out her costumes; she seems bored here, and for a woman who is supposed to be dealing with issues of fear, she never comes across as anything but bland. The movie mostly feels like a weak imitation of THE BLACK SLEEP , a movie which shares two of its cast members (Carradine and Johnson) with this one. A couple of creepy moments do help things, and Harry Fleer’s twitchy zombie is somewhat reminiscent of Herk Harvey’s character in CARNIVAL OF SOULS .

 

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The 30 Foot Bride of Candy Rock (1959)

THE 30 FOOT BRIDE OF CANDY ROCK (1959)
Article 2223 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 4-17-2007
Posting Date: 9-13-2007
Directed by Sidney Miller
Featuring Lou Costello, Dorothy Provine, Gale Gordon

A garbageman inventor finds himself forced to marry his girlfriend when she enters a radioactive cave that turns her into a giantess. He then must protect her from the military forces, who believe that she is an extraterrestrial invader.

This was the only movie Lou Costello made without his partner Bud Abbott. It was also his last movie, and arguably the weakest of all of his movies. Because of this, it’s tempting to blame the movie’s weakness on the absence of Bud, but I don’t think that’s necessarily true; after all, THE TIME OF THEIR LIVES has a reputation as one of his best movies, and though he did it with Bud, it wasn’t as a team. Furthermore, you could easily have substituted Bud in the Gale Gordon part here, and it wouldn’t have made the movie any better. No, what Lou needed here was a decent script; though he’s putting forth his best effort, his lines simply aren’t funny. Director Sidney Miller had a long career as an actor, but he wasn’t much of a director, and the movie suffers from a lack of energy and imagination. I almost get the feeling that the movie was tossed off without much care, which is a shame, as it would prove to be Costello’s last movie; he died before it was released. At any rate, it really makes me appreciate the quality of his movies with Bud Abbott; even the weakest of those come off as better than this one.

 

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