I Drink Your Blood (1970)

I DRINK YOUR BLOOD (1970)
Article #1543 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 6-5-2005
Posting Date: 11-2-2005
Directed by David E. Durston
Featuring Bhaskar roy Chowdhury, Jadine Wong, Rhonda Fultz

When a gang of Satanist hippies rapes a girl and force-feeds LSD to an elderly man, a young boy seeks revenge on them by injecting their meat pies with rabies. The hippies go crazy and embark on a killing spree.

“2 Great Blood-Horrors to Rip Out Your Guts!” screamed the adds when the double feature I DRINK YOUR BLOOD / I EAT YOUR SKIN made its way around the drive-in circuit. I’ve already covered the second feature, a lame zombie flick that certainly didn’t threaten your guts in any way. This one comes a lot closer to the type of movie that would be expected by those who were attracted by the promotional phrase. I think the gorehounds would probably be satisfied, though I’m not sure; the DVD claims that this is the uncut director’s version, which had to be cut to receive an ‘R’ rating, so how much of what I saw was actually seen by audiences back then, I don’t know. In it’s present form, it’s a bloody piece of nastiness, somewhat effective, and it hints somewhat at later movies such as LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT and the works of David Cronenberg (particularly RABID). Ultimately, however, it’s a variation on NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD. I’ve also heard it said that the movie might be a comedy, though that’s hard to say; the movie is extremely silly at times and has some laughable dialogue and acting, but I suspect any comedy is unintentional. Animal lovers will surely want to keep away; I suspect some of the scenes involve the real slaughter of animals.

Blood Freak (1972)

BLOOD FREAK (1972)
Article 3606 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 6-14-2011
Posting Date: 6-29-2011
Directed by Brad F. Ginter and Steve Hawkes
Featuring Steve Hawkes, Dana Cullivan, Heather Hughes
Country: USA
What it is: Christian anti-drug cautionary gore film

A biker takes a job as a food tester at a poultry farm where they have been using experimental drugs. This, combined with his own drug habit, causes him to turn into a blood-drinking turkey monster.

Imagine, if you will, that Herschell Gordon Lewis became a born-again Christian, and decided to use his skills as a gore movie director to make a horror-film update of REEFER MADNESS. I’d heard about this movie for years, and when I got a copy, I held off watching it until it popped up on my hunt list, so I could handle it properly. It’s cheap, amateurish, quite awful, demented, but not quite the laugh riot of some of my favorite bad movies. The only time it gets truly offensive is when it decides to slaughter a turkey onscreen for shock effect. It has one of those endings that will make you want to throw something at your TV screen, but, given the type of movie it is, I’m not surprised it ended the way it does. Still, there are a couple of side comments I want to make about this one. For one, I admire at least that the movie doesn’t restrict its drug criticism to just the illegal variety; after all, the experimental drugs used on the turkeys also shoulder part of the blame. And, if you bear the above comment in mind, then the scene where the movie’s chain-smoking narrator breaks into a coughing fit is not near as impenetrable as some of the comments I’ve heard make it out to be, especially if you’re actually paying attention to what he’s saying.

I Eat Your Skin (1964)

I EAT YOUR SKIN (1964)
(a.k.a. ZOMBIES/VOODOO BLOOD BATH)
Article #946 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 10-17-2003
Posting Date: 3-15-2004
Directed by Del Tenney
Featuring William Joyce, Heather Hewitt, Betty Hyatt Linton

A writer, his boss, and his boss’s wife land on a Caribbean island to get a story, and encounter a scientist and zombies.

When producer Jerry Gross decided he needed a companion movie for his gory thriller I DRINK YOUR BLOOD (it sounds like it should be about vampires, and it’s actually about rabid hippies), he dredged up this Del (HORROR OF PARTY BEACH) Tenney movie and slapped its new title on it (it sounds like it should be about cannibals, and it’s about crusty zombies). This title is more exploitable, but inaccurate; no flesh-eating goes on in this movie. It’s a tad livelier than it might have been, thanks to an energetic soundtrack, but it doesn’t really cover up the fact that the dialogue is awful, the plot is hackneyed, and the acting is at a fairly low level. Those looking for some of the gore of HORROR OF PARTY BEACH will be disappointed; except for an unexpected decapitation, it’s a pretty bloodless affair.

It’s a strange movie in some ways; it seems to be somewhat influenced by the James Bond movies, as the hero surrounds himself with beautiful women and recites passages from his books (they’re supposed to be adventure stories, but the adventures never seem to leave the bedroom). In fact, the opening leads you to believe this is a comedy, but the comedy element vanishes once they reach the island.

Incidentally, the writer’s boss’s wife is played by Betty Hyatt Linton. It’s her only screen role, and once she opens her mouth, you can hear why; she has one of those voices that is guaranteed to cause migraines.

Sing, Baby, Sing (1936)

SING, BABY, SING (1936)
Article 5377 by Dave Sindelar
Date: 2-21-2017
Directed by Sidney Lanfield
Featuring Alice Faye, Adolphe Menjou, Gregory Ratoff
Country: USA
What it is: Musical comedy / Horror

Poor Joan Warren! Not only is her singing career on the skids because she’s not a trendy “blue blood”, but she also has to preview comedy acts by the Ritz Brothers. However, her agent attempts to resurrect her career by romantically linking her with a vacationing but hard-drinking Hollywood actor.

Where does the horror come in? Well, the movie does feature the Ritz Brothers… and that’s a cheap shot, I’ll admit. It’s not their fault I tend to associate them with the dismal THE GORILLA; in reality, they were out of their element in that movie and they knew it. That’s not the case in this movie; there performance consists of a series of vaudeville song-and-dance routines, and there’s something to admire in the deftness of their comic hoofing, However, as far as comedy goes, I feel they come across as a less-inspired Danny Kaye crossed with Huntz Hall at his muggiest, and that’s not a comfortable place to be. Nevertheless, they are responsible for the fantastic content of the movie; one of their routines takes on the Dr. Jekyll story and also features a version of the Frankenstein monster.

Most of the movie is your typical musical comedy of the time. The best thing about it is Adolphe Menjou’s performance as an actor somewhat inspired by John Barrymore; I’ve seen this actor in many movies, but I’ve never quite seen him cut loose in a comic style like this. The movie also features Ted Healy, and quite frankly, the Three Stooges were better off without him. Alice Faye and Gregory Ratoff do a fine job, and some of the songs are pretty decent. All in all, it’s pretty marginal from a genre perspective, but I’ve seen a lot worse.

Guess What Happened to Count Dracula (1970)

GUESS WHAT HAPPENED TO COUNT DRACULA (1970)
Article #1180 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 6-7-2004
Posting Date: 11-4-2004
Directed by Laurence Merrick
Featuring Des Roberts, Claudia Barron, John Landon

A woman comes under the spell of a vampire known as Count Adrian.

The title implies that this movie will tell us what happened to Count Dracula. It does no such thing; Count Adrian is actually the son of Dracula. Yes, I know; that was Count Alucard in another movie, but not in this one. However, there is a character named Alucard; he’s Count Adrian’s pet tiger, who likes to play with the vampires when they’re not cavorting in their sacred Macumba ceremony, in which a woman dances until she entices a man into eating a lizard. This also involves a man in a gorilla suit wearing a pendant; IMDB doesn’t credit the man in the gorilla suit, but I sure know Charley Gemora’s suit when I see it. Highlights of this movie: two vampires have a staredown, Des Roberts is offered a beer, but says “I only drink blood…bloody marys”, and a nurse decides she wants to do it with the doctor on his desk (and you’ll find out what “it” is for yourself.) Des Roberts actually uses a Bela Lugosi accent in portraying Count Adrian. Conclusions: I think this might have been a comedy, but it’s hard to tell. One thing is for sure; it’s a lot classier than the other movie on the DVD (DRACULA, THE DIRTY OLD MAN), but that’s like saying that it’s shorter than SHOAH.

Oh, and did I mention that Count Adrian runs a swinging nightclub known as Dracula’s Castle?