FROZEN SCREAM (1975)
Article 2980 by Dave Sindelar
Viewing Date: 7-5-2009
Posting Date: 10-11-2009
Directed by Frank Roach
Featuring Renee Harmon, Lynne Kocol, Wolf Muser
Country: USA

Doctors are working on a process for immortality that involves lowering the body temperature and injecting them with a fluid that increases the healing process. Unfortunately, the subjects turn into soulless zombies who occasionally go wild.

It’s been a while since I’ve seen a movie of such startling ineptitude. First of all, there’s the acting – yes, I know some of the characters are soulless zombies, but that’s no reason for almost everyone in the cast to act that way, and two of the more energetic performances are from the “soulless zombies”. Then there’s the direction and editing; the story makes no sense, the scenes seem edited at random, and the voiceover narration that’s supposed to clear things up comes up at all the wrong moments and mostly concentrates on the least relevant plot issue – the narrator’s love life. Lil Stanhope may be attractive, but she has one of the thickest accents I’ve ever heard and it’s compounded by lack of articulation. And could someone please explain to me why the rock group that performs “Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin’ On” and “Rock Around the Clock” see fit to change the lyrics? They’re not fooling anybody. Throw in some bad gore effects, horrible dialogue and incompetently staged fight scenes, and you know you’ve got a candidate for one of the worst films of all time. Only one thing works; I got one honest intentional laugh out of a wino’s comment upon being assaulted by a zombie.